Hello internet!
It's been a while, and i have some updates. since my last post in december (i'm the queen of procrastination) a lot has happened. but when i stack it all together and list the last few months in order... it's still boring. isn't that just how life always is? you get bored every once in a while and you find new things to do but in the end you forget what you did last year that one time when you were just sitting around bored out of your mind. I had an experience that resulted from an overdose of boredom and a remedy that ended up being deadly. My room mate and best friend, Nellie, thought that it would be fun if we floated down the Provo river last weekend. She knew some people who had done it the weekend before, drunk and had said it had been a fun time. turns out, people do it all the time and it's common to hear people talk about going down the river in their inner tubes. So Nellie, my sisters Kaylin and Kenna and I decided to buy some $2 dollar floaties (although me and nell splurged and got the $8 ones) and take a lazy run down the river. The floaties we bought are the lounge ones that you see girls tan on all the time and you wonder either how they got into the middle of the pool or how long they've been lyng there because they are not actually wet. We were wearing life jackets because it's the law but would have just as easily gone without them, and i was the only one wearing shoes. if flip flops that i bought at Old Navy 3 years ago count as shoes. As soon as we stepped in the water, i wanted to get out. the water was barely over 40 degrees F which is not surprising as the Provo river is basically melted snow even in mid-July. About 2 seconds after flopping onto my bright pink floatie (with arm and back rests... splurging, you gotta love it) my left faded purple flip flop was torn off my foot by the current. Which was much stronger and rougher than any of us had anticipated. As we floated away from the launch point and went on our way, a man standing on a bridge above us took time to cross himself on our behalf. about 50 feet down i found my lost sandal and slipped it back on only to have the other one disapear about 5 seconds later. soon my wondering shoe decided to go on it's own again and like my sisters and friend i found myself bare foot. after being banged and shoved and twisted through rocks and bushes and branches by the mischievous current we found ourselves standing on a shallow "island" in the middle of the river. Kenna's floatie had completely deflated and Nellie's had deserted her to go find my flip flops. our two remaining rafts were struggling with the four of us and the current was making balance difficult. after most of my body being in the water for only 30 seconds or so i was ready to get out. My sisters felt the same. I think Nellie would have kept going on, thirsty for adventure as she is, but she is also very perceptive. i'm sure she noticed that my sisters and i were ready to climb out of the river and walk back to the car we had left at the departure point. We definitely struggled with that. Climbing out of a river that is rimmed with spiky bushes and lined with jagged rocks was much more painful than i had expected, especially with all of us barefoot. we found an old rail road line that led the way back to nellies car and we began to walk the two most torturous miles of our lives. or at least mine. The railroad ties had been heating in the mid day sun and were just as hot as the river was cold. the earth between the ties felt just as hot and was covered in rocks as well. making a joke, but also half hoping people would think it a valid suggestion, i had the idea to rip up one of our remaining floaties and wrap the pieces around our feet as makeshift mocassins. Turns out that's just what we ended up doing. about ten minutes later we found the road and anyone driving past could clearly see us bruised, wet and with our feet conveniently wrapped in bright pink rubber trudging our way back to what seemed like heaven. Nellies air conditioning. the rubber/plastic/whatever that stuff is, wrapped around our feet helped but also were incredibly uncomfortable. They protected our feet from the immediate heat of the black top but it felt like our feet were slowly cooking. When we took our new shoes off later, you could actually see the sweat pour out from between the strips of what had been a very nice floating lounge chair. we did make it back home after the day felt like it should have ended 3 times over and we all had some rather pretty battle scars. Nell sported a goose egg on her left temple, accidental courtesy of moi when my efforts to hold onto a branch to keep from being swept away were futile. the branch having ended up hitting nell square on after me and the river had pulled it back a considerable distance... Nell, i'm sooooo sorry. Kenna had a sratch starting from under her right eye and curving all the way down to her chin from me and nellies branched neighber, a pointy stick. I am still sporting the mother of all bruises, at least four inches long and 2 wide, on my left thigh undoubtetly from a rock or six. Kaylin was emotionally scarred, but as far as i am aware she got away with some soarness the next day. Needless to say, i'm never going down that river unless i have a legite raft and a legite river guide again. Which it turns out is how your actually supposed to do it. How her drunk friends are still alive i really have no clue.
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